October 1, 2017

Why Family Shouldn't Always Have Your Loyalty

Not everyone is worthy of your loyalty. But the day you are born you are dependent on others. So you attach loyalty to your caretakers, whether or not they deserve it.

My life would be better without you.

You fuckers are ungrateful.

There are toxic parents who plant these whispers inside a child's head - enslaving their minds with guilt and shame.

I'm not the first to say it and I'm not the last - It doesn't matter whether you're blood-related or not. 

A person is just a person. Whether it's mom, dad, brother, cousin, etc. They're all just people. And those titles don't have to mean anything.

But there are children being brought up with a slave mentality. Who feel too guilty to ask their parents for anything. Guilty for no real reason, other than not knowing any better.

The truth is: children didn't ask to be brought into this world. Their parents owe them. 

Even the government recognizes this.

The chicken came before the egg

It takes a fully developed human being to raise a baby into another fully developed human being. That's why minors aren't granted the rights of adults until they're 18. Until then they haven't reached their full 'being', they're still eggs and hatchlings.

"Children are entitled to a safe environment, good nutrition, healthcare, and education."

The world isn't sunshine and rainbows. We know that but children don't. And "under-developed" or "mis-wired" parents fail to give their children a sense of security. Instead they thrive on that deprivation.

You're not gonna make it.

You guys are my bitches.

You're lucky I'm here.

This person of poison cultivates a scary image of life if they weren't around. Taking advantage of a reasonable expectation of trust. 

Children of these toxic persons fear to leave home because they are taught the world is an over-the-top, fucked up place.

When in reality, the household is a far darker place than the outside world. But the children won't realize this until they finally leave.

Toxic parents are just people. You have no obligation to them. Leave.

They offer no genuine security. And that's what loyalty is - a strong feeling of support, security and allegiance to another person.

Don't be loyal to those who aren't loyal to you. Because they don't see you as a person. They see you as an object they possess that they can freely toss around and damage as they please.

Instead, your loyalty must reside with those who are loyal to you. And finding those people isn't easy.

Not too many people know the full quote of "blood is thicker than water" but here it is:

“The blood of the covenant is thicker than the water of the womb.”

This means that those people you've spent the most time with, especially in those trying times, will be the ones you bond best with. Regardless of genetics.

Your brothers and sisters you've known your entire life. Your friends that you've grown up close to for many long years.

You're going to know them as a person far more than anyone else. You'll know their strengths, and you'll know their weaknesses. The quirks you like and the quirks you resent.

But you'll know them inside and out. You may not like everything about them. But you can accept them with all of their strengths and faults. They see you as a person. And you have each other's backs.

The same people that would leave you genuinely broken should they ever leave this world - are the same people you are most loyal to.

When The World Is On Fire

Be The Person They Can Come To


 

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2 comments on “Why Family Shouldn't Always Have Your Loyalty”

  1. There is more to this issue off family. Who you bond to and why.I grew up in an environment(I thought) that family was supposed to be there for you. They were your family, your blood. They loved you. I found out the hard way that "family" is just a word. Those people you knew growing up have changed as much as you did. I won't get into my story, but it was hard to come to terms knowing they didn't care. I was told it was my own fault. I'm the one who left home for college umpteen million years ago and didn't move back and get an ordinary job but instead lived an ever changing life.

  2. Very important article Rich. We owe our kids everything for bringing them into this world and we should never hold them emotionally accountable for our responsibility to them. Sometimes things get hard causing parents to become tired and frustrated. But we must never impose guilt upon them for existing. Great mindset material.

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